ANGELIQUE ELECTRA
A Calling. Elusive, mysterious, indescribable. Real? Is it the meaning of our life? Is it a chosen career? Is it a way of being? Is it a basis for goal setting? Is it the road to personal fulfillment ? Is it necessary to have one?
Following your “Calling” — Myth or Reality?
In the most simplest of terms, it is a very strong, continuing urge toward a particular way of being and doing.
Calling can be or mean anything, including the following as some examples:
The Call to Love and Connect
The Call to Self-Express
The Call to Be Creative
The Call to Serve (God, Country, Causes)
The Call to Nurture (e.g., parenting)
The Call to Become the “Master” of the thing you love
The Call to Achieve Athletic Mastery
The Call to Compete and Win
The Call to Heal, Help Others
The Call to Teach, Enlighten
The Call to Explore, Discover, Invent
The Call to Make Beautiful, Harmonic
The Call to Create and Manifest
The Call to Build (Structures, Businesses)
The Call to Advocate/Activate/Inspire
The Call to Change the World for the Better
The Call to Create Wealth
The Call to Learn
The Call to Experience as Much as You Can
The Call to Travel, See the World
Experiencing a Calling is not a singular event. It’s an ongoing experience unique to each of us, but it may not be experienced consciously as “calling” for some of us. Many of us follow our calling without thinking about it or even consider that it what we are doing. For some, sometimes it’s simply natural, and we follow our flow, our inclinations, preferences, enthusiasm, passions and desires — whatever feels right.
Sometimes the “call” will come to us — whether in a large blast or little inklings that tickle us into exploration and discovery. Synchronicities can also begin to accelerate, turning into guiding breadcrumbs. We start following with a mixture of curiosity and faith.
Sometimes it signals its arrival through discomfort. If we are feeling a strong dissonance or even misery in our current circumstances or choices, the resulting emotions may signal an inner knowing that another path awaits. Calling may emerge through inner conflicts — tight shoes become tighter as time goes on. There is no longer a fit between who you are and how you are being, or what you are doing. It may first show up as negative emotions and reactions against your current reality, or as disturbances in your life. It may be a lost job, self-sabotage or even an illness.
Calling is the expression of our uniqueness. If we are each a unique pattern of traits, characteristics, talents, natural skills, coupled with an imaginative mind, and that all of that translates into a bundle of potential waiting to be actualized, then “Calling” is the spark that opens up and directs that bundle into meaning. It is part of our human condition.
Ignoring the “urge” is sometimes something we do. We don’t believe it’s doable, or even impossible. Or that we don’t feel we can measure up to the scope of our true dreams. We are listening to others rather than our Selves. We do what is expected. We do what we do because others are depending on us. We shove the sense of calling aside.
However, Calling is sourced in the Soul — eternal, all-knowing and all faith-filled. It is that resilient, clear bell in the heart of you that sounds your song, recites the poetry of your life and applauds your achievements. It will wait forever for you, and your full self-expression. It will whisper to you, and sweetly murmur the things that only a mother would to nurture your delight. It is your eternal flame.
When unfulfilled, what may happen is an ongoing sense of emptiness, and even regret. As we grow, we recognize the fallacies of our prior inner arguments and stands that the calling was not realistic, or that we lacked what was needed to achieve them. We can look back and acknowledge that we really had all we needed to walk in the direction of the Calling. But know this, there is no perfect time to actualize your Calling. The timing will always be perfect.
If you are ignoring or fighting the urge, or stuck in paralysis or depression, there will come a time when the dissonance can become so great, you will drop to your knees and seek to understand. To parse it out. To explore if the Calling can be truly honored and activated in your life. The timing is always right, because again, the Soul does not operate according to our earthly notion of time Time is meaningless.
What to do when you know you are NOT following your Calling
First, know and trust that you can. Even if it is not evident to you. Even though the odds may appear to be against you. Begin to nurture the knowingness that if you feel a Calling, it has to be and that it must be expressed. You are currently in a chrysalis, where there is darkness and uncertainty. The path may not be clear, but you are evolving toward it. Trust that you will exercise your butterfly wings.
Invite help. When you walk the path to realize a calling, your monkey mind can cause a circular motion of mixed messages, and even discouragement. It is too hard to parse out along. There are a few ways to gain clarity.
Invite Your Higher Intelligence or Spirit into the dialogue. Simply that. Ask for spiritual support from the Higher Source in your life –to help you questions and discern your thoughts and to guide you in moments of uncertainty. That means mindfulness, meditation, contemplation, free-writing or other form of quieting and focusing your mind, and putting yourself in a position to receive guidance. It is a powerful practice, and will become second nature. Engage in automatic writing. Ask a question, and then start writing. Come back to read and absorb it hours or days later. You will be surprised about the powerful, impactful effects of this partnership.
Get a good coach. A “good” coach will create the space of trust and expanse to deeply examine and process your thinking, and reveal and draw from your own being all the answers you need. A coach has no skin in your game other than to help you realize your dreams and goals which are fueled by calling. Magic can happen in coaching conversations.
Designate supporters and cheerleaders for “Team You.” Choose those who want for you what you want for you. Be mindful of and avoid help from naysayers or people (even friends and family) who rely on your current or limited self-expression to make them feel comfortable and safe. But also keep them tuned in, to begin to understand and inevitably accept the changes important to you. Be enrolling, but protective of your sacred space.
Build or become part of a “wishcraft” group to support your vision and help to realize it is another option (See the fabulous book, “Wishcraft” by Barbara Sher). Finding a “tribe” of others who are seeking fulfillment through Calling can be an amazing experience. As an example, check out Tama Kieves’ “Inspired and Unstoppable Life Tribe” at www.tamakieves.com.
We will be exploring more about Calling in future blog posts. In the meantime, begin to acknowledge its presence in your life through the little inklings, or if there is a big blast, stop and explore its possibilities. Follow your breadcrumbs with the innocence and curiosity of a child. Trust you are okay. Develop certainty about, and trust in your Calling. It is Soulful.
If you are already fully living your calling, celebrate your faith, courage and resilience! We all need you to raise your Voice to share your journeys as mountaineers who have make it to the top, and experience the glorious view!